Emotional Stages of a Breakup
Recognizing The Healing Signs Of An Emotional Breakup
There are several steps in the grieving process which people experience when dealing with the death of a loved one or to the ending of a special relationship. The stages of a relational breakup up are well defined. Though every person goes through each of the phases of relationship grief, there is no set order or time limit to each of these phases. It is a rough road ahead. Understanding that there is a grieving process you will endure will better help you to cope with your emotions.
Following are the different phases you will face during your emotional grieving:
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1. Emotional Pain always follows the tragedy of a loss. To have given so much of yourself to someone else, and then to have them tell you that you aren’t special anymore, and they want to move on can be a devastating blow to your emotional foundation. You will have emotional ups and downs, but you need to go through the pain in order to heal. There will be days you feel like you won’t be able to get out of bed. Just know that what you are feeling is typical, that you will not feel this way forever, and brighter days are on the horizon.
2. Denial that this could never happen to you. You ask yourself over and over again how someone you were so intimate with could suddenly turn you away. How could he walk away from a relationship in which everything fit so perfectly. With denial, you try to convince yourself that the person will see how perfect you are together, and will pick up the relationship where it left off. It is possible for some relationships to rekindle the sparks, but most relationships will not have that happy ending.
They may have been unhappy in the relationship for a long time, and just couldn’t figure out how to tell you. They may actually have begun their grieving process, by pulling away from you, long before they actually sever the ties of your relationship.
3. Releasing your pent up emotions through anger. You may have to get through denial before you realize just how angry this situation has really made you. There will be periodic rants of “After all this time together…”, and “After everything I have shared with you, how dare you treat me as if I never mattered!” ‘No one will be able to live up to me,’ is a frequent belief you try to convince yourself of to soften the blow dealt by the breakup. Anger is widespread as you begin to blame not only yourself and your now ex-partner, but accusations begin to fly at any third party who may have contributed to the downfall of your relationship. You will finally know it’s over when your anger leads you to accept that your relationship was not to be.
People must be cautious of this point in your healing process when the anger begins to lead to acceptance. In this stage people may resort to childish behavior by saying or acting out foolishly. Remain clearheaded when making decisions about the relationship, keeping a tight reign on your anger. Use your anger as a learning experience, and do not let it stop you from ever finding ultimate joy in your next relationship.
4. Grief is yet another phase of emotional loss. Grief is inevitable when you lose something you deeply cared about. A death of a loved one conjures the same feelings as the ending of a relationship. This feeling of grief is a natural step in the mending of a broken heart.
5. Acceptance is the ultimate step in the healing process. The gray clouds lift, and you are ready to let love back into your life. Happiness is a possibility you thought would never happen again. After your emotional roller coaster ride through the death of your relationship, you come out on the other side a stronger, better person, and are once again ready for love.
As a union comes to an end, one will most certainly have to struggle through the stages of relationship breakup. At some point in life, everyone will face an end to a special relationship. The process of grieving will follow its own course and time, and is a healthy and natural way to cleanse your soul and your heart of emotional garbage, so you can find happiness once again.
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